Tea: A hot drink made by infusing the dried crushed leaves of the tea plant in boiling water. Legend goes that in 2737 BC, Chinese emperor Shen Nung was sitting beneath a tree while his servant boiled drinking water. Leaves blew into the water and Shen Nung decided to try this new infusion. From there it grew, branching to various countries, constantly evolving and changing. Present day, there are many vari-teas, and tea has become an important part of distinct cultures. 

As we enter the colder seasons, let’s take a moment to ponder on what teas are worth your time. 

6. Pumpkin

Overrated, go drink something else. Pit-tea to you. Even Garfield junior Cindy Liang agreed, “I’ve never had it, but I know I wouldn’t like it because pumpkin flavored things are not it.” 

5. White Tea

Let’s be brew-tally honest for a second. What even is this? Coming from the Camellia Sinensis plant, white tea apparen-tea-ly retains a high amount of antioxidants and a pinch of caffeine. 

Tasting floral, fresh, and fruity, I need to try this one day. But for now, it gets a solid 5 on the hierarch-tea. 

4. Oolong Tea

Originating from the Ming Dynasty, oolong tea provides a fresh, bright, and sweet flavor. In the early 19th century, the British ambassador to China offered some oolong tea to the Queen of England. She liked it so much that she gave it the name “Oriental Beauty” (oolong live the queen).

Even though oolong is up there, it definitely doesn’t beat the top three teas. If this was your favorite, can we please still get oolong? 

3. Herbal Tea

Healthy, delicious, and diverse. Herbal tea is tea-riffic, especially if you don’t want caffeine. Barley, fruit, peppermint, ginger, hibiscus, sage, lavender, turmeric, cinnamon, and more, it is impossible to go wrong. Varie-tea is what spices up life! 

2. Green Tea

Tasting earthy, clean, and grassy, green tea is except-tea-nal. Green tea is not only delicious, but it also works as a great antioxidant as it contains high concentrations of polyphenols. Matcha, Jasmine, Sencha, and more fall under this ca-tea-gory.

Even though it’s good, don’t always kettle for second best. 

1. Black Tea

If this is your favorite, you are my best-tea. No doubt about it, this tea is on top. With high amounts of caffeine it’s a sure energy booster, though it probably isn’t a good idea if you want to be steep-y. As Liang explained, “Black Tea is a good tea, and very classic. Everyone loves it. So if you haven’t had it, maybe you should go try.” If you don’t like black tea, chai again tomorrow.

I know discussing tea can get heated and some feelings got brew-tally hurt, but let’s all kettle down and get oolong. Either way, you have to admit that these puns are quali-tea. But what’s your favorite type of tea? Or maybe coffee and hot chocolate are more your style. Regardless, I guess you’re pretty tea-riffic.